Living on the fray of a frying pan

by | May 30, 2022

“Be spontaneous!” The notion was outlandish at first, this was too last minute; I hadn’t even had time to process the information ‘for Pete’s sake!’ I thought to myself, frowning. My husband, recognizing the question mark smeared across my forehead, patiently said in a slow, steady but robust tone, “Processing is only for Vienna’s and Polony… you are neither.”

His comment abruptly distorted my cauldron of churning thoughts, causing the corners of my mouth to curl up into a chuckle. Snort. Snigger.


Like shots fired! How can anyone come back from a statement like that with a straight face? My reasoning, obliterated by the mental image of meat mush. Yuk!

Don’t get me wrong, it is not that I cannot make up my mind, let me explain; The acquisition of decision making on a whim can be quite an arduous task. I know it’s not rocket-science,

however, my personality simply needs time to assess the entire situation before basically jumping into the ‘frying pan’ with the heat turned up. ‘Being’ spontaneous is not in my code. At best, being an introvert feels like your brain is switched onto a different frequency. We are so often misunderstood – like an enigma of sorts, a mystery to many.

Over the years, I have come to learn that there is so much power in the physical act of decision making. It is liberating. You stop living in the incessant confinement of inertia! Instead of seeking out balance and precision you opt for rhythm and harmony. In truth, we can’t always live safely on the rim of societies standards of sanity, sometimes it is necessary to be where the pressure is. ‘To be in the frying pan.’ After all, character cannot be developed sans friction or fault.

Without pride or prejudice my sentiments stretch far and wide amongst the class of those who sport the beautiful gift of spontaneity. According to my own standards, ‘you have not lived, if you have not learnt from the ways of others.’ I am incredibly grateful to the opportunities that have granted me insight, to grow and yes even get burnt but none the less live a richer more fulfilling life enhanced with flavors of diversity from escapades, adventures, mishaps and even mistakes. As to my own clan of calculated and perhaps over cautious individuals, it has taken time to appreciate my personal take on life. One that first examines before exploring. At the end of the day, I have learnt to ‘like me’ the quiet, over observant one. The type to notice the details in the dirt the flickers in your eyes, the tell tales in your voice, the swagger in your step. I may not always be the first to jump into the proverbial frying pan, but I will be the one to lend you a helping hand out. Whether we see ourselves as the Vienna’s or the Polony, the hand turning up the heat or the individual deciding whether to swoop into the expanse of the unknown we all have our own degree of processing that needs to take place. Decisions are made and choices need to be lived with.

The classic rhetorical question. “If all of your friends jumped off a cliff, would you jump too?” Is meant to test the power of social influence. Not everyone who dashes to be first in line, knows how to lead – in-fact it is quite the contrary. This being said, I am not writing of blind ignorance with a pinch or arrogance nor am I condoning reckless behaviour.

I am preaching of a spontaneity that is life giving! It causes no harm nor subject to a competitive spirit. A conglomeration of consideration, pause before plunging.

Trust your gut!

Photo by Erik Mclean:

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